One thing you need to be more mindful of is that when you say “living in the present,” you must first cultivate “trust.” It is almost impossible to experience the flow of life and grow up to fullness if you don’t have trust. When you don’t trust someone or something, it will raise inside you some possible “inferiority thoughts or feelings,” which will stop the flow.
Those thoughts and feelings are associated with the state of being resistant, judgmental, hesitant, fearful, dishonest, indifferent, shut down, closed, suspicious, and paranoia. They directly and continuously filter your ways at the time you interact with your spouse, partner, children, or others.
On the contrary, trust enables you to proceed with unconditional assurance to tap into the unknown. You just be and flow. You can experience the total realities with the whole of you. You believe that what you do will not fail, and if it fails, then you know there are reasons behind it. You won’t regret it because the value lies in the process, not a specific outcome. You convince, ultimately, everything works for the greater good. You dare to expose your vulnerabilities to someone or to your surroundings.
You create a safe presence in your thoughts and feelings. You believe that someone or the surroundings will not hurt you but is helping you grow even more. You become less defensive. You develop a unique capability to open your mind and heart more to the larger realities, with more positivity and possibilities, more receptive to uncertainty, and more passion in the interaction or in giving responses. Amazing right!
In other words, trust is incredibly healing and transforming. Trust leads you to hear the voice within and you follow it without hesitation. Trust gives you courage to tell the truth, to be more flexible, to recite gratitude, and of course to be more generous.
Unbelievably, trust, by itself, is an unconditional positive regard toward self and others. The trust then welcomes others to see themselves as they were and are “in and with” you and transform them for the better. That is why professional therapists will convey trust in their therapeutic journey with clients for both individuals and couples. Again, trust is the groundwork and the primary goal of therapy that show the way of healing.